Thursday, May 12, 2011

D Blog Week/Post 4

I can't believe it's already day 4.

Ten Things I Hate About Diabetes

1. That it stole my dreams from me. I was a junior in college when diagnosed and intended to apply for medical school. The fear of the future made me cancel those plans and instead I ended up teaching biology at a school in southern Minnesota. I got tired of unruly students flinging the dissection frogs at each other and in 1978 moved to Minneapolis and took a job in the investment industry.

2. The cost. I have a living room couch that sags in the middle and have never taken a real vacation.

3. The endless waiting. Waiting at the clinic in the checkin line; in the reception area for my name to be called; in the exam room for the doc to come in; for lab reports to come in the mail; on the phone with insurance companies.

4. The fear the crosses my mind when my nephews ask for a refill on their pop.

5. The enormous amount of stuff I have to carry around every day.

7. The shame I feel when my A1C is over 7.

8. The fear that since I have a very serious complication, kidney failure, that there are more horrible things just around the corner.

9. Dialysis.

10. The fear that no one will remember me when I'm gone.

11 comments:

meanderings said...

I have no reply - - - just hugs...

Rachel said...

Waiting, waiting, waiting.

Your family will remember...and the DOC will... I hope that it is far far off, though, to be thinking of it today.

Carol said...

Great list! On the last one, I for one most certainly will. You have shown me that there can be courage in the midst of facing down some of the things that we ALL fear. Thank you!

Kelly Booth said...

I am sorry that you had your dreams stolen because of this disease.

Un-Apologetic Diabetic said...

:( Heartbreaking. So sorry to hear about your dialysis. Such a good list of real reasons to HATE diabetes. Best of luck to you.

Pearlsa said...

Hugs, heartbreak and tears.I hate you, diabetes

Liz said...

((((Hugs))))

Kerri. said...

You are remembered, and loved, now. This list was tough to read, and I'm sure it was tough to write. But I'm glad you shared this.

Vivian said...

Sweet lady, you can wipe #10 right out of your mind because you are loved. You keep fighting to stay around for a long time so we will all have that many more memories of you. You are such an amazing and inspirational person, thank you for sharing yourself with all of us. Sending you tons of virtual hugs.

Katie I. said...

Kathy, I am sending you hugs!! And at the same time, raising a certain finger to this stupid disease!!!

Jane K said...

I'm sorry that you were diagnosed at a time when there was such "fear of the future." You are an inspiration for college juniors today, who can follow their dreams wherever they lead. I echo the other comments - you will be remembered for contributing to the DOC and for being brave and strong and amazing. As for the saggy couch - try a piece of plywood under the cushion...