I have enjoyed reading everybody's recaps of the closing year and hopes for '09.
My holidays were reasonably nice - quiet, simple and stressfree - just the way I like it. I thought that I was cruisin' along quite balanced, until a clerk said a bright "happy new year" to me on Friday and I burst into tears. Yes, it startled me too.
Annual holidays always bring many thoughts of fear into my mindset. A lot can happen in a year. A lot can go wrong with diabetes in a year. Fear shouts to me, "where will you be a year from now, Kathy? - Think of all those decades that you did't take care of yourself. They're bound to catch up with you, sooner or later."
For whatever reason, my image of fear is a Humphrey Bogart man, dressed in a shabby trenchcoat, fedora hat, smoking a cig and standing at the end of my sidewalk, sneering. In the recent years, I have developed some pretty good skills to ignore him. So he comes - let him stand there as long as he wants. Just don't invite him in for tea and cookies. He will soon get tired and go pester someone else.
This winter we've so far had 13 days where the temperature has dipped below zero. Last winter, our total was 3. A co-worker and I were talking about this and she remarked that it's harder to deal with knowing that we've got at least 2 months remaining. It would be a lot easier to tolerate if the end was in sight.
Well, the end is never in sight with db, and that's what's been difficult these last days.
So, in the meantime, we all do what we can. I put on my fancy high-tech face mask (designed so that your glasses don't fog up).
And, if necessary, my Mary Poppins hat.
No, there isn't much of a smile under there, but a certain satisfaction in the fact that I know I'll be comfortable at the bus stop.
And, there is also a satisfaction in knowing that if I do all that I can to take care of the db, then I will probably be here a year from now. Maybe with some amazing adventures to look back on.
Happy New Year to all my friends. May you be served with peace, joy, and fulfillment in 2009!